So. How was your day?!?

"So. How was YOUR day?!?!"  When you hear that statement it is usually after someone has rambled on for 20 minutes about the misfortunes of their day.  And lucky you- that is what I am about to do!! I won't even begin at the beginning of my Saturday morning. (Even though the piece of a waffle I found in our toilet this morning, put their by a certain someone, might give you a clue how the day started, continued and ended.)

Let me just recap the last few hours.  I took Jacob over to my mom's to watch the Razorback football game.  He has to watch it over there because we are a Netflix only household.  Hmmm...and what do I say about having Netflix only on our TV? Lets just say its NOT "wow! I am so glad my husband and boys are on the 247th episode of this show in a 3 week period! What constructive use of their time!!" 

We get to my mom's.  5 minutes into the visit Jacob and Elisabeth have already eaten her out of house and home.  Its in the middle of the afternoon and they have consumed the rest of her fried chicken, chips, cantelope and cereal.  And that just confirms her thoughts that I never feed my children well rounded meals and that is why they are always hungry.

20 minutes into the visit Elisabeth manages to push the screen out of my mom's window.  My mom fixed that window only to have a different window screen pushed out by Ms. destructive baby herself.  My mom follows her around like a nervous wreck after that and literally says, "This is EXACTLY how kids fall to their DEATHS in CABRINI GREEN!!!"  Don't worry mom, I am not going to visit the Cabrini Green slums of Chicago anytime soon. I love my mom.

On to grocery shopping at Walmart.  That is almost a weekly disaster.  First, Elisabeth either destroys or eats half of the food in the cart. Today we leave a long line of crunched cheetos and puddles of squirted out Caprison juice.  I was waiting for them to come on the intercom and say "Cleanup in aisle...umm..clean up EVERYWHERE.  Just follow the lady with the red-headed baby!"

Now, while this is going on my husband is out tromping through the woods all day looking for that ideal place to put his deer stand with one of his friends.  What Chris needs to do is to set a deer stand in my dad's backyard at Beaver Lake.  At any given time there is probably 10 or 15 deer happily nibbling on the corn my dad feeds them 5 feet away from their house.  Of course except when we are visiting and we bring our dog Matty.  Matty's favorite past time is to chase all the deer away from my dad's house.  Matty and my dad do not get along.   Now my husband deserves guy time, he works extremely hard for our family. I appreciate and love him for it.  It would just be nice if his guy time was at 2 am or something.  I am finally done with the grocery saga and heading home with 20,000 grocery bags that I am dreading having to carry in and put away by myself. (After all, that is what I have children for, who lucky for them, were not home either.)

In order to get all the groceries in and keep my daughter from running into the street and pushing out the screens in the neighbors windows I have to strap her in her high chair in the front yard.  When I am seriously taking the last load of groceries in, Matt and Chris drive up.  The first thing they say is "Why is Elisabeth in a high chair in the front yard? Then they see the groceries and Chris says "Quick! Let's drive around the block a few more times." And then they start laughing hysterically.  Chris gets out and offers to help and says as he walks by, "I know, I get the husband of the year award..." 

This was Elisabeth actually sitting in her highchair in the front yard.  You can just read her thoughts, "Come on mamma - let me out of here...I can take out those screens at the Martins in 10 seconds flat."



So.  How was YOUR day?!?!